Rosado: Aisladamente
by ChichaApaza
Summary: *MULTIFANDOM CROSSOVER, POTC, TLM, AND TENG* Chicha continues to struggle in her relationship with Pacha; while accepting Ariel's need to find where she came from. Jack has once again disappeared, leaving her to fend for herself- alone yet again.
1. Naya

Chicha found herself rushing through the city, trying to find her way back to her grandmother's home. She looked about, obviously lost. She could navigate her way through any city, and jungle, but for some reason Cuzco never ceased to get her turned around and lost. She jumped when a hand laid on her shoulder.

"Chicha! It's been so long," an older woman said with a grin. Chicha paused, realizing who it was.  
"Naya?" she asked, breaking into a grin, "Far too long!" She embraced the woman close, smiling. Naya had worked in her grandmother's house for many years, but seeing her out here was disconcerting.  
"Shouldn't you be back at my grandmother's home?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Naya laughed out loud, shaking her head.  
"Oh Chicha, you're just as funny as you were when you were younger," she chuckled, but upon observing the seriously confused look on her face, she chuckled.  
"You really don't remember?" she asked, her hand resting on her cheek, "Chicha, your mother dismissed me long ago."  
"Really?" she asked, "But you were such a good maid."  
"Are you truly so naive?" Naya asked, raising an eyebrow, "You're what, 26 summers now? Really dear." Chicha was completely confused. Naya had always been quite good to her, and her mother never had a complaint about her work. Why would she dismiss her?  
"I'm not sure I understand," she said quietly. Naya shook her head, linking her arm in Chicha's.  
"Come love, let's talk over some lunch. I'm sure you have much to tell me, yes? Tell me, how fairs your father? And I heard you've married!" she smirked, gesturing to her bruise, "Trouble in paradise?"

"My father is sick," she said quietly, "He coughs terribly, blood stains his kerchief. Yes, I am married, I have 3 children... but of course if Papi has his way I'll be leaving my husband in no time." Naya nodded sagely, patting her arm.  
"And your mother? Last I heard, she had disowned you. Has she kept to that promise?" she joked, her eyes soft. Chicha looked down, a lump growing in her throat.  
"Yes, and she shows no signs of going back on it," she joked, despite the sadness she felt. Naya nodded.  
"Your mother always was a rather ruthless woman," she responded quietly, "Now, onto the whole reason I invited you out." Chicha nodded eagerly, wanting to know what exactly had transpired that led up to her dismissal.

"I'm sure your mother was never sparing in her comments on your father's love of other women," she began, "But I want you to know now- your father was not a lecherous man. He was and still is a good man. You must understand this. "  
"I met your father when your Abuelo set up your mother to marry him. Oh, and how handsome he was. He had the curliest black hair I'd ever seen, like a tiny lamb laying on his head," she chuckled, "And he had the tiniest mustache. It was as if he had drawn it on with a piece of khol! But he had the kindest eyes. Your mother was quite set on marrying that advisor man and would hear nothing from anyone on the matter. Your father came to me distraught.

'What shall I do?' he asked me, 'She will not marry me.' Of course, I told him that she was just throwing one of her temper tantrums and that she would come out of it eventually. He shook his head, he looked so sad. 'I don't want to marry her either,' he told me, 'She's too young...' Naturally he was perfectly right. She was 14! Se couldn't be expected to fall in love or even want to marry at such a young age. I held him, comforted him. He needed the comfort of a woman, and I was able to give it to him." She smiled, shaking her head, "They were married, and Chasca demanded I go with her as her maid. I did, and Atoc and I became wonderful friends. Of course, with your mother's temper being what it was...he was often alone even with her in the room. He and I would talk for hours, about the land, about the village. He confided everything in me. There came a day though when we became more than friends. He had caught me alone in the fields, having finished my work. He kissed me," she paused, looking at Chicha intensely, "Have you ever touched lips with a man and felt as if you were two puzzle pieces fitting together?"

Chicha nodded, she knew the feeling well. She felt it every time her and Jack's lips touched, every time their hands brushed against one another's.

"I felt that the moment your father kissed me. And He felt it too. He told me. We knew we could not ignore our need for one another."  
"Need?" Chicha asked.  
"Yes, need," Naya replied, "Your father is incapable of loving anything or anyone ...well, with the exception of you and your children. He needed someone who would accept that and still care for him. Of course, I can't say that I exactly accepted it...but nevertheless, I didn't badger him about it. Your mother found out about us and sent me back to your grandmother. And when your grandmother died, she dismissed me."

Chicha sat back, trying to take it all in. Her father really had cheated on her mother...and with Naya. She looked at the older woman's finely lined face, her features not any prettier than her mother's. She didn't understand it. It couldn't possibly be for her beauty.

"Desperation," she whispered to herself.  
"What was that?" Naya asked, her face displaying her curiosity.  
"Desperation," Chicha said, looking up, "He was desperate for love. You were desperate for it too. So many terrible things happen...out of desperation."  
Naya didn't argue, looking down.  
"I did not mean for things to go so badly," she said quietly, "It was a mistake." Chicha shook her head, standing.  
"Don't be sorry, Naya," she said, laying some money on the table, "I understand what happened. I'll tell my father you send him all the best."  
"Oh, would you? Thank you dear," she said, standing herself. She pulled Chicha close, hugging her tightly, "Never become that desperate, dear. It only leads to trouble."


	2. Alone

_Desperation only leads to trouble._  
She sat alone in her room, thinking hard on what Naya had said.  
_Desperation only leads to trouble..._

She was desperate again. Ariel had left once more, leaving a note on the table telling her she was leaving in search of her birth parents. She fought the need to cry, as she stared at another letter, laying next to it. The last letter that Jack had sent her, dated for 3 months prior. She was certain that if it had been a momentary delay, or if he were going on a long trip, he would have written her warning her so. But there was nothing. No warning, no notice. Just a lack of letters.

She just knew something bad had happened, she felt it in the pit of her stomach. No matter where he had gone before, she had always felt confident that he was alright. She had always felt his presence in a way. Now, she felt...nothing. It was as if all the light had gone out of her heart...and she was terrified. She wasn't even sure if he had told anyone about her- she may never know what happened. She felt tears slip from her eyes, staining and blurring the words on the page.

_I'll be back to you soon. It seems the Gov'ner is no longer in need of my services, having gone into retirement. I find myself with a great deal of time and a lack of duties in which to fulfill. I will be on your doorstep and in your arms soon, luv. I'm counting the days._

Obviously something had gone wrong...or perhaps he had found another woman. She bit her lip, the fear ever present in her mind since her and Naya had spoken. If her father could do that...what would stop Jack? He had more than the accessibility of women...and besides, he wasn't even married to her...could she blame him if he did? After all...she hadn't exactly been...faithful, if she weren't to mince words.

No, that wasn't who Jack was. He would never do that to her...well, he would never do that to Ariel...she wasn't sure if he'd never do it to her. She stood from the table, looking out the window at the night sky. Jack...Ariel...they were gone. What did she have now? Of course she had Chaca and Tipo; and they were more than enough, but it was still crushing. She was alone.

She tried to imagine how Ariel felt. Lost? Alone? Confused? She couldn't imagine as hard as she tried. She hoped with all her heart that when she found her birth family that they would love her as much as she did...it wasn't possible to love her any more than that. She would come home, wouldn't she? She'd miss her...wouldn't she? She shook her head.

_Desperation only leads to trouble._


	3. La Llorina

Pacha received a summons to the... "Emperor's" palace in Cuzco, giving Chicha solitude for a day while he did whatever the figurehead of the country wanted. She stood from her chair, her very pregnant belly giving her no respite in hindering her movements. She sighed, washing the dishes in the sink while the children slept.  
She had hoped that her third child would be Jack's...but after not hearing from him for over a year, she had almost lost hope in him even being alive. _Why hold on to something that's only hurting me?_ She thought to herself, _I'm waiting for a ghost._

She moved like a ghost through her daily chores, cleaning and cooking and keeping up after the animals, feeling like an empty husk of herself. Nothing could make her feel whole. No food could fill her, no drink could quench her thirst, no touch could warm her. She looked normal, completely docile. She and Pacha had not fought in weeks. She smiled and entertained and played with the children...but she was hollow. She cried herself to sleep, her chest filled with the icy ache of loss. She was so lost within herself that the days passed without her notice.  
Pacha had no idea, thinking that their relationship was better than ever. He kissed her without her pulling away, he held her without her fighting him off, she didn't even argue when he wanted her to sleep with him. He was in heaven, he finally had the wife he had always wanted.  
And the entire time, Chicha wasn't present.

She couldn't help it. Losing Ariel had taken a huge toll on her heart...her daughter was also her dear friend. Then, with losing Jack on top of it...the only thing keeping her alive was the twins. She lived, breathed and ate for them; unable to find any other reason. What else was there? If she could have, she probably would have disappeared.

"She haunts that house," the few villagers who had seen her whispered, "She's there, she does everything she should, but the light is gone from her. She's like a candle, snuffed out too early."  
"She's so quiet."  
"She's died. She isn't amongst the living."

Some of Chaca and Tipo's friends had even taken to calling her "La Llorina". No one knew what had happened to the oldest girl, the one with parrot feather red hair. Chicha's mourning made them all fear the worst of her. What woman would weep so if she did not cause the demise of the child? And what had happened to the man? They all worried for the woman, but with tempered distance. She was always very different. Who knew what she was capable of now.

She didn't care for anything that the villagers said. So long as the children were happy and Pacha left her be for the most part, she was satisfied with her reason for living. _How far can you bend a woman before she breaks?_ Fate just kept bending and twisting her whatever way it pleased, and she was worn out. She was exhausted.

She snapped out of it when Yzma and Kronk had showed up at her home, trying to snow her into believing that they were Pacha's relatives. She hid her smirk when Yzma announced her relationship to Pacha. Y_ou don't look like you could be related to him...and you're entirely too smart,_ she thought to herself. And the large built man couldn't possibly be related to Pacha. Mentally, sure, she could see it. But that build being anywhere in Pacha's family tree? She doubted it. No, these people were out to hurt her or her children and she snapped into defense mode.

Of course, Pacha was so good to let her know that they were actually murderously-intentioned villains seeking out Pacha and Kuzco. Still...she couldn't just let them go after the man. She was married to him. Luckily, Tipo and Chaca were just as clever as her and managed to set an elaborate trap, sending the woman off with the parting gift of pain.

She slowly became herself after the incident. At least she wasn't the living dead any longer.


	4. Dear Jack

_Dear Jack, _

_ I don't know where you are...I don't even know if you're still alive. In fact, I could be writing this letter to a ghost. But that isn't what matters. _  
_ What matters is how much I love you. You were right all those years ago when you said what I needed was freedom. I still need it. _

_You are my freedom. _

_You set my soul free. When you used to tell me about the sea and how there was no greater feeling than the fresh salt air and the gentle rock of a ship, I thought I could never share that passion with you. But I can. You are the fresh air in my chest, you are the gentle and steady sway of my soul. You are the sun that shines in my life...you are my sea. You found me when I was young and trapped and you saw right through me. You gave me wings and you let me fly, but I couldn't do it on my own. You've always been the one who held my heart in the palm of your hand. _

_I have not slept one night without dreaming of you, not lived one day without longing for you, I have not taken one breath without the icy ache of your absence. I press my hand to my chest, it is empty. It lacks the gentle pulse of the living, a drum without a player. _

_What keeps your from writing to me? Have you found another woman? It would kill me inside...but I could easily forgive it when you returned to my arms. Do you not think it is a cruel enough punishment, being gone from you...pretending to be something I'm not? I feel like I'm suffocating._

_What can soothe the cries of an uneasy heart? What relief is there when all of me wants to throw myself at your feet, beg your forgiveness- but a silly childhood promise stops me? I see no one but you. I have loved no one but you. _

_I want no one but you. _

_I don't care where you are, or what you've done in your past. I don't even care what you may do. I still love you completely and unconditionally, and all I do is pray that you'll return to me soon. My arms will always be open for you. _

_I promised to be your safe harbor. I won't ever go back on that promise.  
_  
She folded the letter, kissing it gently. What could she do? There was nothing. She took it to the local delivery boy.  
"Take it to the ocean," she said quietly, "Throw it in the waters."  
"Just...throw it in? Are you sure, ma'am?" She nodded, handing him a few extra coins.  
"That's where he is. He will get it," she whispered, "I know it."_  
_


	5. Dear Ariel

_Dear Ariel,_

_I loved you before I ever knew of you. I was blessed with the news of you during your father's absence and shortly after I married Pacha. It gave me the hope to go on, you saved my life._  
_ Thank you for being my inspiration. You make me want to do great things but most importantly, you make me want to be good. Because of you, I want to be a better person and make the right choices, no matter how hard and that means being a strong person and a good Mother. I still have much work to do on myself and there are certain things that I have not mastered yet. At least now, I make a conscious decision to be aware, to be honest with myself and do the work it takes to make things right. Every day I give thanks and am grateful for the life that I have with you and your siblings. _

_Forgive your father and I for the things we've done that you don't agree with. It's not always easy to forgive when someone has hurt you but anger and resentment should not be carried. It will make you bitter and cause damage to your physical and emotional health. At worst, it will kill your spirit. Please do not misunderstand, I do not wish for you to be walked on or taken advantage of but I am sure you will be able to recognize and find a balance. Most importantly, you must always forgive yourself. It's all right to make mistakes, in fact, it is how we learn and grow. You might even make the same mistakes a few times before you are able to recognize and choose another way. _

_There is a whole universe out there and anything is possible. Believe in Love and magic. I do believe that words have power and even greater power when spoken out loud. It's making a wish and believing in it with everything in you. Never wish harm on anyone. _  
_ Believe in yourself. That means you should always trust your intuition, your fist instincts are usually right. Believing in yourself means that you should know you could do anything you set your mind to. With commitment and hard work you will get where ever it is you want to be and know that nothing great or worth anything is ever easy. _

_Always tell the truth. There are many versions of a truth and many sides to a story; so always take all versions of the truth into account before making a judgment. Your father is a very good case and point of this. Be honest with yourself and with others. _  
_ Family is the very essence of our identity. Family is the most important and should always be put first. Always be proud of your family, if for no other reason, because they are a part of you. They love you unconditionally and support you. They are your "rock ". They are the one's you can lean on in life. We may be different, and we may be strange...but never doubt our love for you. We are always your biggest supporters, and we will never stop loving your...for any reason._

_First and for most, stay clear of the nay-sayers. Secondly, Don't follow the pack, in other words, be a leader not a follower. Thirdly, Have your own ideas and your own mind. Be careful not to get caught up in other's gossip and misery. Gossip is ugly and empty, fill yourself up with joy and surround yourself with positive people. I am sure you will get caught up in gossip and drama at some point in your life, the same as I have, but recognize it and run. It too is draining and toxic to your soul. People who don't care about or respect them selves cannot possibly care for or respect you. Respect the privacy of others. Don't worry so much about the way other people live their lives, so long as it doesn't affect you. Put that energy into yourself and the things you want out of life. And when life gets too busy, retreat to yourself and do the things that make you feel good and strong inside. The people that really do love and respect you will be there when you're feeling better. For the people that take it personal, well, that's there issue. You have the right to "be " and do not always need to explain your self to everyone all the time. _  
_ LOVE YOURSELF! Stand by your convictions. Try to have an open mind and always try to put your self in someone else's shoes before judging them. Don't have the need to be perfect (none of us are) otherwise, it will be hard for you to see your faults and you will hurt people in the process. If you're honest with yourself you will be able to do the noble deed of righting your wrongs by apologizing and admitting when you're at fault. "Never ever, shrink or downplay yourself so that others around you will not feel insecure or inferior." You are deserving!_  
_ Life can be busy but you do have the right to say no with out feeling guilty or selfish when you need to rejuvenate. In fact, if you constantly cater to everyone else's needs or wants, you will lose yourself and have nothing to give back. In other words, you will be depleted, drained and unhappy because you will have lost your sense of self. Ask your father...this is why we aren't married right this moment. I made a foolish promise as a child...and I am still to afraid to say no. _

_Its OK to be scared so long as you move through it. Everyone is scared sometimes. I am scared right now, scared that you won't come back to me, scared that your father is in trouble, but I will keep going anyway because it is important. Know that you are loved and not alone and that your family will always be here for you no matter what happens in life. Be patient and know that things take time. It's not the end of the world if you fail, so long as you don't give up. "My motto is "keep failing until you succeed."_  
_ (Just in case, for some reason, your Father or myself are not here) If ever you feel overwhelmed or like you world is caving, my advice is to look ahead. That also goes for the times when you are scared. I promise, hope will comfort you._

_As a friend it is our job to listen and support, whether we agree or not. It is not our place to judge the choices that other's make, even if we love them. Others need to learn on their own so that they can grow and find out whom they are inside and what it is that will make them happy. People change because life is a constant process and I don't think it's ever good to stay at a stand still for too long. Although it can definitely be scary, change is good. (I have a hard time with it) but our friends will need us to stand by them. Not "kick them when they're down" or make them second- guess themselves when they are already confused. Also, remember that not everyone has had a loving and supportive family to guide them. So, be a kind, loyal, respectful, honest, forgiving and compassionate friend. _

_You have the right to say no, you have the right to change your mind, you have the right to be wrong and make mistakes. You have the right to defend yourself, you have the right to have your own thoughts, feelings and ideas, and you have the right to "be." _

_Give thanks, Keep your promises, Daydream, sing out loud, dance the night away, surround yourself with beauty, use the saying "And this too shall pass", laugh hysterically! Help the meek, Pick your battles, communicate effectively, see things through, set boundaries! Take responsibility for your actions, Make a list of things you want to do in life and work toward them! Guilt is a manmade emotion and also a useless one (beware, some use it to manipulate). Fall in love. Know that when we lose someone we love, they become our protectors, our guardian angel. When you cry, I hope that they will be tears of joy. I pray that you will have a daughter some day and the experience of knowing the purest bond there is, and that you will be a proud mother, never a jealous one. Know that in the end, even after you read this, you have the right to live your life in your own way._

_I wish this letter could have been more like a "fairytale" letter, that I could shelter you from the hard things in life. But this has been my reality and I have taken the hard road many times, even when, at times, I might have had guidance. I have wasted time but wanted you to have a head start by going through life with your eyes open. I would never change anything because I think that my life choices led me to you. I don't want you to have regrets, because life is precious, you are precious! _

_I will always be proud of you. The fact remain, your life will be what you make of it. And, no matter which life choices you make, I will love you. You are MY DAUGHTER I will love you until the moon is no more, until the end of forever._

_Love Always,_**  
**_Your Mother_


End file.
